Oceanic Golden Pass

What is the only constant in Lost? For every answer we get, there are 10 more unanswered questions. In this week’s episode my mind literally gets blown. ABC puts some C4 into my pea brain and blows it up.  The star of this week’s episode is our favorite insane, bearded Scotsman. No, not Sean Connery silly…. it Desmond brutha!

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LOST Season 4 Episode 4: Eggtown has just aired. I feel better.
Sometimes I wish I never let these people setup cameras and audio equipment on my island in the first place. I can’t imagine the amount of money they spent on the setup… there is a LOT of equipment.

Anyway, back to this weeks release. Just like in that Jacob forsaken “hatch” from earlier on, I ended up being held prisoner, in my own home no less, by Mr John Locke. He really is so “Lost” at this point. Anyway, you get to see a time, reminiscent of Season 1 (did you get fooled into thinking it was a flashback?), where I manipulate Locke, Locke gets mad, Locke throws food. Oh ya, he also suggests reading a book more than once which is ridiculous. I *never* have to read a book more than once… if I do, it is out of sheer insanity.
I’m insane.

Moving on…

1. Jack
2. Kate
3. Hurley
4. Sayid
5. Aaron
6. ???
7. Polar Bears
8. Smokey

“CarrRrl!”
-Ben

Happy Valentine’s Day to all the Losties out there! For those of you who spent Valentine’s Day checking out the “Tail Section” of your significant other and didn’t get a chance to catch the latest episode yet, skip this post. Actually, everyone in general should skip this post…

Anyways it seems we have a new power couple on the island. errr off the island. It seems Sayid and Ben have hooked up after a drunken night of cosmopolitans and jello shots and are now working together to rid the world of Uggs, animal print shirts, and other fashion faux pas. Let’s review how these two started bumping uglies:

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We haven’t seen much about the character played by actor Matthew Abaddon (creepy guy who visits Hurley), but I think he’s the most interesting character introduced so far this season. He seems to be in charge of Naomi and her team, but we don’t know anything about him. UNTIL NOW!

Get ready for the big reveal. I’m going to spill the beans about Mr. Mysterious bald creepy black guy (Who will be referred to as MBCBG from now on).

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The internet was set aflame last season, when Jack told the new chief of surgery to get his dad down there and see if he was drunker than Jack. A lot of people theorized that Jack was just really drunk and realized his father was dead, but just misspoke due to the large amount of alcohol in his blood. The staff of OceanicGoldenPass.com proposes something else…

Christian Shepard is ALIVE.

Yes… why do we see him on the island? Why was his body missing from his casket? Why was he sitting in Jacob’s chair? It’s because the island has reincarnated him to imbue into Christian Shepard’s dead body the will and spirit of the island, and boy is it pissed. Ever been woken up by a cold shower? Well multiply that by about 50 million. That is how pissed Christian Shepard is going to be, and it sure ain’t gonna be pretty.

I predict next episode we will see a Jack’s father, who everybody thinks is dead, alive and well, chumming it up with the Losties (and the Others?)

**Spoiler Warning**

Tonight, on Confirmed Dead, we were introduced to a whole bunch of new characters.

First is our squirrelly friend, Daniel Faraday. He shares his last name with famous physicist Michael Faraday, who was famous for his research in magnetic fields and their effects on islands in the mid-Pacific ocean. Our friend Daniel, claims to also be a physicist. Coincidence?

Next is our spikey faced friend (from X-men), Miles, whose full name we find is Miles Strong.. or Strom… or Stron. Now… if it’s Strom, then what dead senator does that remind us of? Anybody? That’s right… Strom Thurmond — racist and immortal from the south. The south shall rise again? Strom Thurmond sure will, and I have a feeling Miles won’t be that easy to kill, either. Let’s also consider if his last name is actually Strong… Well, I sat here for the past 2 hours coming up with anagrams for his name, and this one seems too good to be true: Miles Strong == Lost In Germs.

Boo-yah! So, all of that bio hazard gear in the helicopter that Jack found? It’s because they are LOSTTTTTTT in GERMS… that is, after the people on the boat find Ben, and want to light a match.

So, that leaves us with Charlotte… Her middle name is Staples — Could she be the heiress to the Staples empire, whose U.S. branches number in the millions, just on the east coast. I wonder if perhaps they are looking to expand into the Pacific Ocean? The island, after all, is rich in natural resources, such as trees — which is great for making …. PAPER. and babies.

That leaves us with good ol’ Frank Lapidus. Now, we know he’s grizzled, and we know he sees cows, so maybe he’s a… polar bear?

Aside from that, our friend also has a nice anagram in his name… Frank Lapidus == Drunk as I Flap.

Yes! Our drunken helicopter pilot friend, flaps while he’s drunk! That is why the helicopter got struck by lightning, and that’s how he was able to land it… it’s not him flying the helicopter, but he becomes ONE with the helicopter, since HE is the one FLAPPING!

That’s all for this week. Email us with your favorite theories, and we will steal them and use them as our own!

Well, here is the clip that ran late in the broadcast of Eli Stone after the Lost Season 4 Premiere tonight.

The Oceanic announcement mentions the “Golden Pass” that allows you to “fly anywhere in the world, anytime you want, as many times as you want” …which sounds like it would be a nice contest to win.

This site will chronicle where this “adventure” takes us.
This site will be your Golden Pass to all that is LOST.